Stella Press

I’d like to address my elephant in the room. She’s sitting atop the table in the center, throwing shade when I dare look. Ugly and snarly and judgemental,she is able to swallow me and feed me to the parasites at the bottom of the barrel. Her name is Envy.

There are signs everywhere that I should look the other way. Even as I scroll through the gems dropped on social media, I see the warnings. Life lessons disguised in colorful words and brainy quotes

“ How to be successful: Mind your own.”

And a new favorite: “Envy is the art of counting another’s blessing instead of your own.”- Harold Coffin

But still I’m ashamed of my struggle with reality. Some mornings, I preoccupy myself with throwback moments when I should have made another decision, worrying about the what ifs.

Bad move.

It was time to take responsibility and snatch myself together. I had to figure out a formula to help me focus more on my passion and journey, away from the distractions streaming through social media.

Admitting is the First Step

I’m ashamed of my habit. The fact that I could easily dismiss my achievements against that of my peers because theirs seem more polished is almost a sin. But I have learned to praise what may appear as my shortcomings. To embrace the things that life has chosen only me for. The hiccup in my laugh, the easy strides of my steps, these are all mine. I have struggled to find balance of who I am becoming with who I used to be but it always came from deeper.The real me. No funny business or shiny filters. What I like and don’t, agree with and won’t, all a part of me that contribute to the diversity that is the universe. It makes it easier to believe. And I believe in me.

There Is Happiness In The Struggle

My mother used to tell me to suck it up. “Well that’s how things work’” she would say. “You just have to move it on.” There have been times when my struggle has been real. . But my faith has taught me that there is a dynamic of the universe that can spit out the good that I’ve somehow managed to spare. So in change, there is a light at the end of my darkness. And always there is solace. Always there is a moment of clarity when I feel as though the world is leaning on my side for a change. Times change and things keep moving but remembering to keep a solid mind can be gold in these changing times.

Remember Why You Started

I started because I wanted my four year old to see what dreaming was. He will understand that hard work is dedication and consistency. That his momma is a fighter and he in turn can naturally be great. I have every human bone in my body working against me at some point or another. But it’s the why that keeps me in check. I’m never sure where my next step can lead me but if I can remain positive and focus on what my endgame is, then there is hope that I can find my way.

Have you had moments when you get tired on your journey? What are some tips you would like to share about keeping motivated?

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It’s 2016. Self-promotion is the key to creating opportunities and this generation of creators are building careers off of it. But still, it’s a tough thing to self promote. It’s icky, sticky and almost terrifying. Yet, aForbes article expresses the importance of self-promotion for career growth. Compared to male counterparts, women were advancing at a lesser rate in addition to  waiting longer for pay raises.Still, we fear a sensible solution-promoting ourselves in order to explain why our hard work needs a platform, save sounding tacky while at it.

It’s hard to take the opportunity to tell a superior, client or prospective employer how knowledgeable you are in a field while not sounding forced or rehearsed. I can testify to the quiet awkward pauses. So I’ve learned some key things to help me remember the benefits of promoting my value.

Believe

It starts with being able to believe in what you do. Your passion should stem from your genuine need to support your belief. The biggest part of being comfortable with promoting ourselves, is our ability to completely surrender to our faith. I am learning to be a bigger cheerleader for me because if not me then who. If I shy away from my achievements and choose to not embrace my value, how fair would that be to me?

Practice Makes Perfect

WIth everything, it takes time getting comfortable explaining your passion. It’s important to allow time to fumble or make mistakes. Try out your elevator pitches in front of friends. Self promotion is related to the works of networking so up your networking skills to gain that comfort level. Make these easy connections in real time so that the promotion of your work through other channels could be just as a breeze.

Remain Authentic

Probably the most important tip to remember is to be yourself. A great part of self promotion is done through transparency and staying true to yourself is of great value. There is no real way to be authentic but to be the open and honest version of you. I have learned that on the journey when my eyes are the only ones on my back, I have to listen to my truths. Learn why I laugh, or why I frown. Why I might not wake up in the mood or why my days might lack fulfillment. These are the foundations to my creative ideas and I care to respect them.

Even though I may still struggle with shaking the nerves of promoting my work and promoting my value but along my journey, I’ve learned to take risks and understand the value in my growth. There’s no real fear in being me so promoting for me should be easy.

We all know it. We all fear it. Sometimes we don’t even want to look directly at it because it will haunt our entire day. The to-do list. Many a times I’ve scribbled down something and posted it on the fridge door. Many a time I forgot to remember the something and move on with the hustle that is surviving these cold streets. Even while I sit here without a working laptop scribbling the old fashion way on real paper, I should be trying to get my electronic baby fixed. Finding the time to remember what I’m supposed to do is becoming a small task itself.

So how does one keep up with tasks while still finding time to hustle?

Keep your list to 3 Items

I try to minimize my to do lists because it helps me figure out what’s important to me. These are the three things I need to accomplish and the easy number makes it hard to. It’s important for me not to feel overloaded with tasks so keeping it short and simple can increase my chances at actually completing it.

Go off Grid

For most people, the internet is the biggest distraction. Sometimes it’s great to establish a schedule for going online-and sticking to it. Maybe I’d browse online in the morning or late evening, but I try to limit my internet intake. It helps me free up the rest of my time to do those important stuff on my to do list.

Take a Morning Moment

The morning is the fresh part of the day when the mind and body are feeling refreshed. Take a moment. Smell the morning. Hit the snooze-twice. Enjoy a small part of your morning doing something you love or nothing at all. I like to call it my morning time out when I mentally plan my day. I take note of what didn’t happen the day before and without  eating myself up for it, plan the perfect day in my head. It helps me understand what I really want. Taking a moment to yourself can be the difference between a good and overwhelming day.

It’s not the wisest idea to beat yourself up for not getting something done. We all get the feeling that 24 hours is hardly enough. Sadly, it’s never going to change, but maybe a slight switch to your habits might bring in some positive light.

How do you tackle your to do lists? What are some tips you would give to someone struggling to find the time?

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There’s never enough hours in a day. And so, many business women can struggle to find a balance between their personal and professional worlds. There are mompreneurs who have done it but how does one make time for family and motherhood while running a full time business. How can the career woman spend time growing her business without the guilt of losing family time. It’s a tough act to balance but there are a few handy tips to help a hand.

Schedule and Organize Time

Time is so short with only a few hours a day to be as productive as the day before. Establishing a schedule is important with planning a structured future for your business and creating a family schedule is just as effective. Break down your day to include a couple of hours of family time away from your business where you can reconnect. Organize and prioritize your work tasks into parts of your day so they are easier to accomplish. With a little bit of shuffling around work errands, meetings and must-do’s, find the time to sit down with your children to have a conversation about school and save some time for your partner who has been supportive enough to push you towards your goals.

It’s All In the WHO

We’ve heard it enough in 2015, surround yourself with awesome people and awesome things come out of it. In the world of creativity, 89% is inspiration drawn from surroundings. The people who are around you and who you allow into your circle should be worthy of the time that you spend away from your family. It is always nice to catch up with an old high school friend but if it cannot fit into your schedule, don’t let guilt eat you up. There are people you make time for and there are people who can get some of your free time. Deciding who these people are can make it easier to open up your schedule to include more work to-do’s or family obligations.

It’s Okay to Say “No”

Not every meeting can be put off to another time but if you think that one will affect some of your personal time, it is okay to say “no, can we find another time.” Some events, meetups or meetings are not a priority and it’s important to remember that it’s okay. Prioritizing is making tough decisions and keeping ideas and tasks organized. Create a vision board, use up your planner, use a calendar, but figure out who and what deserves your time and how much of it.

Women are some of the most remarkable beings with ability to spread time and energy across business owner and motherhood. Keeping the balance between the two is a tough task but not impossible. What are some of the best advice you have received with balancing personal and business obligations?[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]

Have you ever conjured up an idea that sounded crazy? Even while the excitement was building up around said idea, there is still some reservation for actually exploring it.

 

“If at first, the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.” –Albert Einstein

 

How many times have you thought of starting something, changing a direction or even moving at a different pace and you ended up talking yourself out of it because a) either you were too scared or b) you were really really scared.Every grand idea should instill that fear. It’s nerve wrecking, debilitating and downright scary to take on something new but it’s always worth it. Give yourself some credit to be able to follow through with your crazy idea, then give yourself some organization to fully help it flourish.

Zero in on your crazy

Organize your thoughts. The creative mind is a constant flood of new ideas, theories and possibilities so the best way to keep track of these is to write things down. Jot them down in your notebook, on a napkin or scribble it in the corner of your palm. Keep record of all those useful pieces to your puzzle so that later when you need to get organized, everything can fall into place just a little bit easier. Business model canvases can be a great source  to help with directing your idea into more solid territory, and ultimately a business.

What problem are you solving?

Take a look around you. Everyday we see people with the same ideas yet they address different problems. Some may even be addressing the same problem, with a different approach. How are you trying to solve a similar or unique problem? What is your one of a kind approach? What are you solving? The questions are tough but valid. It’s important to take notice of the people who have done it before you. Understand their methods and search for their mistakes. Make it your business to solve the problems that they couldn’t solve. Ask yourself the tough questions so when it is time to answer them from someone else, you’ve already given yourself the answer.

Get Feedback

If your idea is crazy, but you’ve polished it enough to make sense to the people around you- you’ve got a home run. Reach out the people who would give you their honest opinion. Give them a rundown of your plan and gauge their reactions. Take into account that not everyone will think you have something good so still feel encouraged and offer up some positive questions to help shape your idea. What do they like/dislike about it ? Does it sound like something they would be interested in? Have they ever even heard of anything similar? Could they give some suggestions? It’s always a good idea to ask these questions and ask for feedback. Sometimes we get so very caught up in our creative world, that we forget there are people outside who can help. Feedback is an awesome way to boost your confidence in your creation and the best time to start is after some organized thinking and strategic planning.
We all have extraordinary ideas brewing in the deep cauldrons of our creative minds but sometimes fear can be the only obstacle and it’s unfair. Unfair to yourself and your potential. Give yourself some credit and take charge of your crazy. In this world nowadays, it may be the only thing that sets you apart.

How have you turned your crazy idea into a business? What advice would you give to someone just starting off with their idea? What was the most valuable piece of advice given to you?

I finally got a chance to catch up on my reading to finish Sophia Amoruso’s  #Girlboss and the founder and CEO of Nasty Gal dropped some serious gems to her readers who were looking for a prosperous future becoming their own boss. I admire her openness and willingness to share her story but I respected more her brass to tell it like it is. EVerything she had to say was integral to becoming a well rounded successful individual but there were some pieces of advice that leapt from the pages at me and I thought I would share them with you.

“When your time spent making money is significantly greater than your time spent spending money, you will be amazed at how much you can save without even really thinking about it.”

1. Do The Dirty Work

There’s a lot of sleepless nights, cranky mornings and wigged out afternoons that come with running any type of company or business. Sophia was the one working woman machine who was the model, photographer, editor, sales expert and ceo of her growing brand and vintage clothing company. She didn’t shy away from the early mornings or grueling hours and she learned how to give some of her best work through her earlier challenges. Give yourself some time to impress you. Be ready to tackle the tasks at hand when getting your business off the ground and work hard at your goals. Success doesn’t usually come without the blood, sweat and tears of a hard worker, so be prepared to fight for your vision in order to help portray the best of yourself.
2. Small Milestones Can Add up to a Giant Enterprise

There are so many times in the past when I have looked over tiny milestones because they weren’t the larger ones I wanted to accomplish. Sophia reminds us to appreciate the small accomplishments. Understand the work to step over that hurdle and savor it before you move on to something else. On this journey of expanding your creativity with a business, there isn’t much time spent on appreciating the smaller milestones but they are the stepping stones to the larger successes. They are the small time wins that give way to the big time enterprises so learn to enjoy every small moment as its own defining one.
3. Treat Your Mind Like Your Money- Don’t Waste it

Then the church said Amen. Live within your means and understand your worth; financially and mentally. You are responsible for your health and well being so take care of yourself. Take care of your mind as you would your money because neither should be wasted.

Take control of your life and create a balance that feeds into your life financially while fostering growth mentally. Learn new things, meet new people and open up to new ideas. Be mindful of how important your time is and careful of who you deem worthy to spend it with. Accept the truth that not everyone deserves to be in your space and not everything warrants for your attention. Be careful of negativity and when your mind is working, let it work in favor of you. Lead your mind to valuable thoughts and take care of your business.

There’s a #Girlboss in every single woman. Doesn’t matter if you even consider yourself a #girlboss, just know that you are. Women are increasingly becoming the face of new businesses and it’s exciting to see how many of us have taken control while letting our dreams run wild.

Remember where your passion came from and pay attention to your growth. Words can only guide you to the right thoughts so now it’s time for you to take action and take control.

Are you ready to be a #Girlboss? What would you add to this short list of advice for women becoming wanting to become their own bosses?

In this ever growing world of entrepreneurs, the word ‘No” is easily very commonly heard. We hear it when we pitch our ideas to investors, when we receive the letters with the word ‘Unfortunately’ in the first paragraph and when the client is not interested. But how do we keep a positive state of mind all the while pursuing a prosperous vision? How did the all the geniuses fight through the no’s for a life altering yes? Turning negatives into positives is not always easy. It takes a determined mindset to flip the switch but here are a few ways I like to remember to stay calm and enjoy my journey through.

Don’t be afraid to fail. Don’t waste energy trying to cover up failure. Learn from your failures and go on to the next challenge. It’s OK to fail. If you’re not failing, you’re not growing. –H. Stanley Judd

1. Admit your doubts

We all have it. The little voice that insists we don’t have it all together. Half of the time it’s that small percentage of negativity naturally residing within us but more often it’s the feeling of being unprepared. I’ve learned-the hard way- that preparation takes time and work and facing the smallest doubts or concerns can save a load of headache in the future. Admit-to yourself or whoever would listen- that your idea may need a little more attention or sometimes even a second look. Many times when the response is no, it’s not because it can’t be done but merely because it won’t be done. Thus there is something there to be reviewed to reveal the why. Why wasn’t your approach successful and how can you make it so? Go over the details of the why and be as honest as you can be with yourself so you can ultimately grow from each experience.

2. Don’t take it too seriously

Try not to beat yourself up over the same issue many other entrepreneurs face. Let’s face it. We all hear no. Some people have heard it so many times that a yes can come as a shock-but it’s worth it. Think of every no as a step closer to a yes. Don’t deny yourself the satisfaction that you tried your best and you can give more. Learn from every no and embrace it as you would a yes because eventually when you do start to make a breakthrough, it would count just that much more.

3. Sharpen your pitch

Review. Review. Review. Pay attention to the details in your pitch. Were you unable to answer a valuable question? Do you think you could include some hard facts to drive your point home? Should you try a new approach? What changes can be made to maximize effect? Keep in mind that your pitches should vary on an individual basis and if you are trying to impress a person or an organization that you do your homework. Explore possibilities where both parties can compensate-not only financially but also with building lasting relationships. Pay close attention to your proposal and put yourself in the person’s shoes to try to understand what should be important to mention.

Always remember that a no is like the open doorway to the yes.

What are some ways you’ve turned your no into a yes? What advice would you give to someone who has yet to hear yes?